Age of the Primes Onyx Prime

Thusfar, Age of the Primes looks like another toyline that I'll skip almost entirely, with exceptions being those that are either holdovers from Legacy (more likely their 'Retro G1' remixes) or figures like this one, which fits about as well into TransFormers as did the live action movie Dinobots or TLK Megatron.

I have to confess that my knowledge of the Primes is pretty much non-existent, both in terms of who they are and how/why they entered the lore... But, if I had to guess, it was probably Furman (and I'd be right). The idea of thirteen Primes representing aspects of Cybertronian physiology or society isn't inherently bad, per se, just... superfluous... And their introduction into TransFormers media really highlights how astonishingly easy it is for a moderately proficient writer to define authority figures and get a whole community of people to accept them as gods in a religion.

Nevertheless, we're currently at a point in the Age of the Primes line where there's only a couple more of The Thirteen to go - Quintus and Amalgamous, both of whom sound interesting in theory, but look terrible as toys - and I'm highly unlikely to add them to my collection... Let's see if Onyx Prime can help us ascertain why that is...

Seventeenth Anniversary

Cynics in my audience might have expected that getting back into full-time employment back in January of this year might dispel the sense of ennui I've had for the last few years of TransFormers... but, if anything, it's made it worse. Sure, I have some disposable income now, but the ever-increasing prices and ever-decreasing quality of the merchandise leaves me largely without any compelling reason to spend my money on Hasbro's mainstream output. Not to say I haven't bought anything since last September, but you'll see what I mean when I get to the list.

So, without wanting to get into spoilers, here's this year's Dishonourable Mentions:

Trying Out Another New Webshop - AKA Not Another Unboxing IX

Although when I say 'new', I mean only that it's new to me - Show.Z Store have been around for ages, I've just never tried ordering from them before. However, they listed Unique Toys R-09 Red Destroyer before my usual online retailers - even those others also based in China - and, with the fear of missing out uncommonly strong on this figure, I preordered him at the earliest opportunity, back in mid-August.

Preordering can be a bit of a gamble at the best of times, but this one actually got quite alarming when I received notification of despatch on 4th September, precisely a week before I was due to fly to Iceland with my girlfriend, for a relaxing break after she handed in her MSc thesis. This meant that there was a chance the package would arrive while we were away... and, knowing most couriers, that meant it might end up getting shipped back to China before I even returned home.

Notification that the package was out for delivery arrived the very day we were set to fly out... though there was no indication that delivery had actually been attempted when I checked the tracking later on.

However, while away, on a coach, out in the wilds of Iceland, I got a phone call from the courier, attempting to deliver. I explained that I was out of the country, and asked if delivery could be rescheduled for this week. He seemed to be OK with that, but couldn't offer anything concrete, so I later visited the courier's website to look for my options. Finding nothing, I contacted their UK Customer Service department via email, explaining the situation and asking again for delivery to be rescheduled to anytime this week. They emailed back to confirm that was all OK, and that they'd flag my package for delivery in the week commencing 15th September.

However, the following day - as Courtney and I were on our way back to the airport - I got another call, from another courier. When I explained that I was still out of the country, but due back later that day and that I believed that I'd arranged for delivery to happen another day, this one said he could see that my package had been flagged for redelivery, but that no date had been specified... and he pretty much insisted on making the delivery there and then, leaving it with a neighbour.

Thankfully, it all worked out... but I dropped the Customer Service department another email to say that someone hadn't received the memo about holding the package for a day or two before attempting another delivery, and have yet to see any response from them.

So, super-fast delivery from Show.Z Store - this package probably cleared UK Customs at Heathrow quicker than I did - if somewhat nerve-wracking in its final stages. Not Show.Z's fault at all, but I'll be certain to avoid ordering from them - or any other overseas vendor, for that matter - anywhere near a holiday, and potentially avoid pre-ordering entirely, as far as is practical.

Cybertron Primus

Here, finally, we have the last of my ancient Draft posts for this blog, now with the advantage of sparkly new photos because the originals (taken in February 2011!) had the same busy background of shelves that all the other images from that era had. Looking back, it's kind of bizarre that it's taken me more than 14 full years to complete this post considering Primus is such a significant figure in TransFormers lore and, in the Cybertron/Galaxy Force continuity amongst others, literally the home planet of the TransFormers.

Given the struggles Hasbro/Takara Tomy had in creating a reasonably convincing Unicron figure for the Armada toyline, one would think they'd have second thoughts about another toy that transformed into a planet. However, idea that Primus - Simon Furman's supposed 'God' of Cybertron - actually transformed into the planet Cybertron itself was clearly too tempting to pass on. There are plenty of other things he could have been instead, if they'd thought about it and, given the average fan reaction at the time to large plastic robots that transform into imperfect spheres, a bit of imagination probably would have been appreciated by many. After all, this was a character who had never before been clearly or definitively depicted in any of the associated media (the weird, Rodimus Prime-inspired version from the 1980s Marvel comics doesn't really count). That said, one can't argue with the dramatic power of a planet that transforms into a colossal robot...

Also, when Galaxy Force/Cybertron rolled around, Unicron had become a black hole (in the TV show) and a tank-thing resembling The Ark from G1 (in the Hasbro toyline), and the revelation of Primus became a plot point, so it was pretty much inevitable that he'd appear in some form.

So, with a still semi-recent, colossal Legacy Unicron toy thanks to the HasLab crowdfunding scheme and a smaller Third Party rival already available, let's - finally! - take a look at the second TransFormers planetformer Hasbro actually released. The only real question was whether the design and engineering teams had learned the right lessons from the reception of Armada Unicron...

Trying A New Webshop - AKA Not An Unboxing Post VIII

So, while most online retailers - including Hasbro Pulse - are listing the likes of KSI Widow and TFOne Elita-1 as preorders, expected in the next month or so, I learned that a Northamptonshire-based retailer by the name of The Whole Shebang already had both in stock.

Better still, where some other retailers have imported stock of yet-to-be-released figures and - quite reasonably - sold them at a markup, these were going for the expected RRP of about £25 each. I'll get into whether or not almost £50 for these two was money well spent when I do their individual write-ups, but I'll say for now that The Whole Shebang has impressed me: not only was despatch very fast (ordered on the evening of 26th, notification of despatch came at lunchtime the following day), each box was individually wrapped in bubblewrap, with the sturdy enclosing box further padded with packing paper. I also liked that the box was sent via Royal Mail, given the distinctly variable service I've received from couriers like DPD, Yodel and Evri. My local postman is an absolute treasure, so I know anything coming in the post will get to me in good condition.

Revenge of the Fallen Ransack

It's often said that aircraft don't make for good vehicle modes for TransFormers toys... and with evidence running from G1 Silverbolt to the very latest incarnation of that same character in the Age of the Primes toyline, and even the Masterpiece version of movie Starscream, it's hard to deny. However, there have been rare treats, such as Generations/Reveal the Shield Lugnut, and Third Party companies have worked wonders with movieverse designs, let alone their own unique creations.

So, where goes Ransack fall on this spectrum of achievements? Buckle up, flybots... we're in for a wild ride!