The Other Half 3: The Next Toyline!

Apologies for the abundance of text-only posts... It's almost as if I'm treating this blog as a blog. This one is almost a counterpoint to yesterday's post, and it came together pretty quickly, so there didn't seem to be much point delaying it till after the next toy post (whenever that may be - hopefully soon).

 

On a complete whim, just for fun, and following my screed on the travesty that was the War For Cybertron Trilogy, I asked my girlfriend, Courtney, what she would do if she were tasked with creating a concept for a new TransFormers toyline. She's seen several of the TV shows, and even admitted to skimming through my toy review posts, so she has a pretty good grounding in the brand, and certainly has her own opinions on what has worked and what hasn't as far as the more prominent associated media goes.

 

Furthermore, she has said she likes the concept of 'robots in disguise' - as well as the idea of toys that are essentially action figures, vehicles and puzzles, all in one - and particularly likes the TransFormers toys that were derived from Takara's Micro Change line.

 

So, given free reign, without the need to refer to any existing TransFormers continuity or franchise in terms of characters or setting, what would her pitch be for a future TransFormers toyline?

 

Here's what she came up with...

• The Autobots are in space, having left Cybertron for reasons. They intercept radio signals from Earth advertising new appliances. They recognise these as the native robots on Earth and choose these as alternate modes to blend in with the wildlife
• They land in 1950s New Mexico in the backyard of a house that a couple are moving into
• Going into the empty house they explore and find spaces where appliances might be
• One finds a pink lawn flamingo
• The wife comes home and they transform into the fridge, hoover, flamingo, etc.
• The wife thanks her husband for the expensive gifts, he distractedly says "you're welcome" (assuming his assistant ordered them)
• The next day she tries to use them, they don't work as expected
• She is also lonely and talks to herself
• Montage of TransFormers trying to be helpful
• Then she realises they are... robots in disguise!
• She assumes she is going mad and doesn't tell anyone
• Some Decepticons come and are their usual naughty selves, but the Autobots save her
• She realises she isn't going mad, and just has lots of new robot friends
• Her husband doesn't twig, because he is busy in his government job at Roswell, trying to locate the crash site for several large fallen objects...

Key Autobots: No names and not necessarily shoehorning in G1 characters, but disguised as such things as a hoover, a fridge, a drinks cart, a trouserpress (who doesn't like the husband, so always messes up his clothes) and, of course, the pink flamingo lawn ornament. All would probably need to have alternate disguises for the sake of mobility.

 

Key Decepticons: At least one who turns into "a really cool old car". They would likely all have larger, more mobile and more dangerous disguises.

Now, I don't think for a moment that this is a viable concept for a toyline that Hasbro would actually produce and market... but let's take a look at the details.

 

First and foremost, we have a setting that blends the essence of Jim Shooter and Bob Budiansky's treatment for Generation 1 with... BotBots. Rather than the damaged computer of a crash-landed starship misidentifying vehicles and machines as the dominant lifeform, we have the Autobots themselves misinterpreting TV and radio advertising, and choosing their forms accordingly. Strangely, I do not find this fusion as repellent as BotBots is, in and of itself. Starting the story about 30 years before established G1 is a novel idea, but probably one of the biggest points of contention for making and marketing a toyline for 21st Century kids (and/or Collectors). Might go down well with those who see the 50s as some kind of Golden Age, I guess, but kids these days likely wouldn't be familiar with half of the appliances of that era...

One could be unkind and suggest, "Ugh, but this is clearly a girls' toyline, for girls. Its main character is a girl. All the toys would be household applicances, like the toys you get for girls. Wouldn't they all just transform into girl robots? Why would anyone but girls want to play with these? Ugh!". In response, I would humbly submit that such opinions are hopelessly outdated. Sure, toy versions of household appliances are still commonly marketed to young girls, but that's a pretty sexist strategy and, really, who cares? Anyone who thinks for a moment that girls wouldn't have been interested in a microcassette recorder that can turn into a robot or a microscope that can turn into a robot is either wilfully misunderstanding girls, or seriously underestimating them, quite possibly in a misguided attempt to force them into conforming with an outdated lifestyle narrative. And, anyway, Soundwave was generally depicted as a portable (full-size) cassette player and, if anything, girls tended to get interested in music long before boys, back when I was a kid.

 

Plus, appliances back in the 50s had a particular aesthetic to them - their manufacturers were proud of their products and used them to make a statement, with bold colours and opulent, artistic designs, as appliances you could trust for life. Nowadays, everything is homogenous and has to blend in... and then, ideally, conk out after a couple of years so you buy the new model.

In any event, I don't think anyone, in this day and age, has any objections to a story focused on a female protagonist. Hollywood has certainly been slow to pick up on it, and many studios still insist on sabotaging such properties with dumbed-down male caricature antagonists, but a good story is a good story, regardless of the main character's gender.

And, as far as the toyline goes, are BotBots specifically marketed at girls? No, didn't think so.

 

Tying it in to the many legends and rumours about Roswell, New Mexico - site of one of the world's most renowned UFO hoaxes/coverups - is actually quite an astute move, possibly arising from Courtney's love of The X-Files. The family dynamic also reminds me a little of the developing relationship between June Darby and Agent William Fowler in TransFormers Prime (looking up his name reminded me that TransFormers Prime is now more than ten years old - basically ready for its own Anniversary celebration), and how things might have progressed between them after the series ended.

 

What initially reads as a purely domestic setting need not be as restrictive as it first seems. I'm reminded of an old TV show - approximately contemporary to the Generation 1 cartoon - called Scarecrow & Mrs. King, in which a divorcée and mother of two children, Amanda King, becomes embroiled in the espionage game after a chance encounter with a spy, codenamed Scarecrow. I have fond memories of that show (which starred Bruce Boxleitner, of TRON, Babylon 5 and, more recently Supergirl, alongside former Charlie's Angel Kate Jackson), so that probably colours my feelings toward this aspect of the concept. What it does highlight is that the husband would have to be barely present in the new home - working ridiculous hours and basically living at his workplace - or the Autobots would logically need to reveal themselves to both parties.

The "Montage of TransFormers trying to be helpful" reminds me of the movie Batteries Not Included, which is another point in its favour. The scenes could also have a more sinister edge to them, really digging in to the wife's fears that she's losing her mind, making the eventual appearance of Decepticons - and the revelation that the Autobots are on her side - all the more powerful.

It even retains the Autobot/Decepticon conflict that has been the core of the brand since its inception (with the exception of BotBots). That the Autobots are small enough to become household appliances, while the Decepticons can be cars and other vehicles adds a new dimension to the conflict. The Autobots were always outgunned, but making them all substantially smaller and weaker than the Decepticons emphasises that they're the underdogs, possibly slaves... Much like a 1950s US housewife.

Wow. The HEXdidn't... TransForm-A-Blog: Come for the toys, stay for the social commentary.

I can imagine, on one of his rare visits at home, the husband leaves files and photos related to his work out on a coffee table, revealing to the Autobots that the Decepticons are infiltrating the planet, but the humans are on the wrong track. They enlist the help of the wife to investigate (since they can't exactly get around by themselves in their given disguises), so she disguises herself and sneaks into various situations, gradually foiling the Decepticons' plans while uncovering their full extent. Naturally, along the way, the Decepticons realise someone - seemingly a human, of all things - is working against them, and try to figure out who, and how.

This concept almost has more potential as a TV show - possibly in the action/screwball comedy line - with the wife trying to maintain a stable household populated by alien robots disguised as her appliances. On this note, I quite like the idea of an oven that actually functions like the Replicators from Star Trek - rather than cooking normally, it scans an example of a finished meal, then reproduces it. There would be new, potentially Decepticon-related hijinks every week, building to a climax where the wife and the Autobots save the day after the husband belatedly uncovers the existance of - and is captured by - the Decepticons. I figure the pink lawn flamingo 'bot would be the hero of the moment.

 

It would have to be a period setting, because everything looks the same these days. It would have to be a period setting, because otherwise the female protagonist wouldn't present quite the same level of central conflict (perceived responsibilities to home and husband versus the greater responsibility to her country/world/species). It would have to be a small town out in the sticks, but close to some kind of military/government facility because it'd be impossible to hide in a big city, and the Decepticons would need something to target as part of their larger plan. It would have to have a female protagonist, because otherwise the the temptation to just forgo the concept of robots in disguise would be too great, when there could be giant robot battles out in the open, the military/government teaming up with the Autobots, and the existance of alien robots being revealed to the world entire, just like in the second live action movie.

I kinda love this idea. It's low-key, focused, and has narrative potential.

 

And, at the end of the day, this ably demonstrates just one of the many reasons I love Courtney: not only has she never expressed even the slightest disdain toward me - an adult, and somewhat older than herself, at that - collecting what are ostensibly children's toys; not only has she always been willing to indulge me by watching some of the TV shows and movies that have been in some way significant to me; not only has she attended one of the conventions with me; but she is willing to engage with my hobby to the point of discussing the state of the toyline, and then developing a proposal for what she, personally, would like to see from a series based around the concept of alien robots able to disguise themselves by transforming into everyday objects and machines. Granted, this isn't a regular occurrence in our household - I seem to badger her into writing something for my blog once every two-and-a-half to three years - but she's been very stressed recently, has a lot on her mind, and yet still had a go at drafting a toyline proposal in response to another of my daft whims, and knocked it out of the frickin' park.

Now, I don't tend to get a great deal of feedback on this blog, but I would genuinely love to hear:

• What my readers think of this proposal - questions, complaints, alternatives.
  
• What kind of TransFormers toyline YOU would produce, if you were given the creative reins of the franchise.